We are awesome at giving to everyone but ourselves. We are brilliant at having compassion and empathy for others, but we constantly beat ourselves up everyday. We constantly fear we are not enough, we are unworthy and unloved, thus we conform to the norms of society and try to ‘fit in’.
I know I’ve definitely been there and it wasn’t very pleasant. There have been so many occasions where I compromised my own identity, values, health, happiness etc just to feel accepted and to belong.
At 14 years of age, I got into an unhealthy relationship where I spent the next 6 years being abused physically and emotionally. Then I stayed in that relationship because I thought it was what I deserved.
During my teenage years, I starved myself to go from a size 10 to a size 6, because I thought I was ‘fat’. I based a lot of my self-esteem and self-worth on people’s acceptance and approval of me. I constantly sought attention and validation from others and felt depressed if I didn’t receive it. I had beaten myself up for making mistakes and for not being ‘perfect’. Even if I succeeded in something, I still didn’t think it was good enough. Even when I got into a relationship that was loving and nurturing, I self sabotaged it because I believed I was unworthy.
I’ve learnt to pick myself up every time I failed and to not criticise myself for being human and making mistakes.
I’ve learnt to look fear in the eyes, to push outside of my comfort zone and go after my goals and dreams. I’ve learnt to love my body and my curves, to accept my short button-nose, my flappy arms, my broad shoulders, my stretch-marks, cellulite and many more imperfections that make me uniquely ME.
But if you are not convinced yet, let me share with you some reasons why it is an absolute MUST to love yourself, fully & wholeheartedly:
“Our deepest fear is not that we’re inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we’re powerful beyond measure.” - Marianne Williamson.
Do you struggle with loving yourself? How do you try to overcome this?
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